Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
