After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize