i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
