i permit you to call me
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
