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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
ugly people sure do ruin things
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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