i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
