a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize