Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
