Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
How naked do you want me to be?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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