Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
My bed smells like the plague
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
