I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
This is the high leading the old right now
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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