id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
