I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
