We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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