Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
