Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
