Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
