Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
organizing the empties. That sober.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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