Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
