Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
