i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
