I want to have your abortion
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
