I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
