Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
