also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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