in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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