Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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