Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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