My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
