I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
You can't special order awesome
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
