I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
