I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
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