stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize