He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
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