I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
