I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
should my penis look like a turkey
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
