Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
It's Friday. Sex?
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
