Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
