Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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