i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
