it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
