His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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