I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
