Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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