Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
My breasts were aching with rage.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
