I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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