two words: eviction party
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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