I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
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