Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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