I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
operation harelip BJ is a go
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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